- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me according to my perception of my appearance and within this allowed myself to see it as if I am not good enough due to the fact that I judge my body as not good enough. I now see and realize that I am not defined by how my body looks so thus when and as I see that I am going into my mind judging myself according to my definition of how my body looks and thus seeing myself as not good enough – I stop and I breathe – I realize that how I look does not define who I am so thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue judging myself as not good enough just because I see that I do not look like the photoshopped pictures in the magazines.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my thighs as not good enough due to a belief and idea about what size and shape they must have for me to be able to see them as good enough. I see and realize the absolute bullshit in accepting and allowing myself to judge myself according to my thighs in a belief that they do not have the right shape and size so thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue this constant and automated self-judgment. When and as I see that I am looking at my thighs and are about to start judging them according to their “flaws” within my mind – I stop and I breathe – I realize that I am not defined by the shape and size that my thighs have so thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue judging my thighs as not good enough just due to the picture I see of the thighs within my mind. My thighs are here as unconditional support and I do not accept or allow myself to continue fucking with my body just because I do not approve of the picture presentation.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my body in a belief and idea that my body is mere a picture in a picture reality and so I allowed myself to don’t give a fuck about my physical body but instead tried to shape and mold it through absolute self-abuse and never ever even considered the body as myself. I see and realize that I am nothing without my body and that my body has always been here as unconditional support even though I have never done anything to deserve it. I thank my body through and with the realization that I am equal to and one with my physical – I do not accept or allow myself to continue seeing my physical body as mere a picture in a picture reality but instead I see, realize and understand the amazing opportunity my physical have given me as life and I do not accept or allow any more abuse since I have seen and realized that my body won’t be able to take anymore mistreatment or cruelty.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself according to what size my body has, in a belief that the smaller the greater and within this not at all considered the physical body as to what is best for the physical body, but only taken the picture presentation into consideration. I see and realize that this is mere a belief and idea that I have placed value to and feeding through allowing myself to connect having control and self-discipline to being extremely skinny. I see, realize and understand the total fuckness and bullshit within accepting and allowing myself to believe in the idea and belief that control would have anything to do with not eating. I see and realize that when I didn’t eat at all I also didn’t have any control what so ever since I had given ALL my power away to my mind as my ego and thus I allowed my thoughts, emotions and feelings such as anxiety, fears, self-definitions and self-judgments to have the control and direction over me. I see and realize that every time I allow myself to think and believe that not eating is equivalent to having control I am manipulating myself through going into the mind, feeding a belief-system that is not based on reality. I do not accept or allow myself to continue getting manipulated by my ego and mind but instead I stand up in such moments when and as I see that thoughts/beliefs/ideas about what control is arises and I direct myself out of the mind with the realization that it is mere a manipulation-tactic and I will not accept or allow myself to continue falling for that bullshit – instead I breathe and I take myself back to reality through allowing myself to stop the manipulation and instead directing myself.
- I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use and abuse my body for shallow purposes such as wanting to look a certain way and within this allowed myself to constantly try to reach that experience of perfection – not realizing that the experience that I was searching for does not exist for real but that it is mere an experience within my mind as energy. I see and realize that wanting and desiring an energy of the mind will only sustain for so long and thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue abusing and using my body as a tool to get an energy of the mind – but instead I see and realize that the energy will only exist for so long and that every time I allow myself to try and become perfect as the picture I have of what perfection is within my mind – I am compromising and killing my physical body. I realize that the only perfection existing is that of not defining myself according to my physical appearance but instead live with and as the realization that I am life. I do not accept or allow myself to continue abusing and using life as a way to get to experience an energy but instead I stop myself and I breathe through such thoughts/desires/wants/needs and I realize that they are not real – that the only thing that is real is that of physical substance.
I commit myself to flag-point every self-judgment I have towards my physical appearance and every time such judgment comes up I stop myself with the realization that I am not defined by how I look and that my body won’t accept any more abuse.
I commit myself to realize that my physical body gave me a second chance even though I virtually killed it through only existing within and according to my mind as the voices in my head. And so I commit myself to take this second chance through actually allowing myself to live and give unconditional support to my physical body as it supported me. I give what I received and I received life. I realize that I own life my total appreciation so therefor I do not accept anything less than life hereafter.
I commit myself to choose life and I realize that choosing life means to not judge my physical body as separate from me but to instead live with gratitude and constant appreciation that my body never gave up on me even though I constantly abused it. I thank my physical body for the life and opportunity to life that it has given me.
I commit myself to stop using and abusing my body just because of desires/wants/needs of my mind as ego but instead I realize that the desires/wants/needs of having a perfect body as to what I would define as perfect is not real since it has no substance – I realize that the only thing that is real is the physical and thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue living as an illusion within my mind.