- I forgive myself that
I have accepted and allowed myself to anticipate, expect and fear the worst
within situations where I am faced with something that I cannot foretell in the
sense of not knowing exactly what the future might bring – and within this I
forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to immediately assume
and anticipate that the worst possible thing that could happen will happen –
where I furthermore forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
participate within internal imaginations and future projections that are based
on an alternate reality, representing the worst thing that I believe could
happen – instead of seeing and realizing that participating within such future
projections and internal imaginations is really not supporting me in any kind
of way but that such participation will rather just generate experiences of
fear, anxiety stress and worry – and I realize that instead of placing my focus
and attention within internal imaginary realities that leads to internal
turmoil I can within the moment decide not to participate, not to go into and not
follow such imaginations but to instead realize that I know where such internal
participation leads, and it’s really not supporting me in any kind of way – and
so therefor I commit myself to assist and support myself within moments and
situations where I see that my attention and focus are within an imaginary and
illusive reality that is playing out within the mind – where I within this stop
my participation, breathe and change my focus back to here, back to that which
exist directly here as the physical – where I no more accept and allow myself
to just blindly follow what comes up due to thinking and believing that it in
some way can help me – but instead I commit myself to immediately stop, where I
stop following and stop complying with what comes up and instead bring myself
back to here, back to breath where I focus on what is here within the moment.
- I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being ‘mentally prepared’
for the worst case scenario in the sense of being faced with a reality that I
haven’t conjured up within the mind beforehand – and so within that thinking
and believing that I am doing myself a favor through imagining and playing out
all the different scenarios and futures that I believe to be possible outcomes
– and I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to trust
myself and my capacity to face and walk through any situation, as the actual
real reality, when it is here – because within this I see, realize and
understand that I cannot walk through or face something beforehand, before it
is actually, physically, practically here – and that when I ‘attempt to prepare
myself’ I am actually ONLY inflicting and generating fears, anxiety and stress
– so, therefor I see and realize that I am participating within, accepting and
allowing, self-manipulation and self-sabotage when and as I believe that I
require to and am doing myself a favor through internally imagining and playing
out the worst case scenario – that it will not in any way support me – and I
see, realize and understand that supporting myself through this would be to
focus on being here, on stabilizing myself within my relationship to me and
live self-responsibility through realizing that I do have the capacity and the
ability to face and walk anything when it is here, that I do have me, that I do
have the tools with which to utilize to stabilize myself within situations and
moments – so therefor I commit myself to make sure that I participate in, face
and walk through that which exists directly here as the physical, and trust
myself and my capacity to support myself and to do what is best within any
given situation – and in that realize that I can only walk and face that which
exists directly here – moment by moment, one breath at a time.
- I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to automatically go into the mind where
I attempt and try to find out all the different possible outcomes and results,
as how my future may or might look or change, when I am being faced with
something unexpected as new information that I was not aware of and did not
take into account previously – and I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to go into a state of complete paranoia through letting the mind
run rampant when being faced with something unexpected – where I furthermore
forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt and try to
fathom how my life may or might change within the mind – where I see and
realize that I cannot look at something direct and cannot see clearly when I
accept and allow myself to trust imaginations and thoughts and experiences that
emerges within the mind as a response to unexpected information – because within
that I am taking things to an extreme, where I see and realize that I cannot
trust what emerges as a response within the mind because in that I am merely
preventing myself from looking at solutions, from looking directly at what is
here, what I can practically do with such information, what I require doing to
assist and support myself and so walk it, step by step, seeing what needs to be
done as an assessment of what I require and need within my relationship to me,
within my life and reality and so align my life and living accordingly – and in
this I see and realize how simple it is, and how I make it complicated and overwhelming
when it in practicality doesn’t have to be that way, where I see that I can
make it easy through assisting and supporting myself to stop trusting what
emerges within the mind as a response and instead practically look at if there
is something I require to do/change within my life and living and thus what I
can do with such information – where I see and realize that all I require doing
is to continue assisting and supporting myself, making sure that I prioritize supporting
my physical and stabilizing my internal – and how, if or when my life may or
might change is then something I walk when it is here, and align my self-support
according to what is here – and therefor I commit myself to walk this for myself,
to assist and support myself through looking at what I require to do and what I
can do to support myself within every moment – where I align myself with that
which is here, where I assess practically what I require within the moment and
so walk it and align it according to what exists directly here.
- I forgive myself that
I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that others or another will think or
believe that I am in some way dependent on, in need of or reliant on that
person – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed
myself to go into an immediate reaction of anger and aversion when and as I
perceive a pattern within another that indicates that that person thinks or
believes that I expect something or anything from that being or am in some way
dependent, in need of or reliant on that person – where I see and realize that
I have accepted and allowed myself to create a fear to and towards becoming
dependent on or in some way count on another; from the perspective of expecting
something from another or expecting another to be here for me when I, in some
way, would require or be in need of assistance or support – as I within that
have linked and connected such dependency to undoubtedly and definitely getting
disappointed, deceived and let down – and where I thus turn this fear of
getting let down by another into anger, where I see and realize that I have
formed an automatic pattern wherein I push people away through anger, exclusion,
spitefulness and aversion as an attempt to protect myself from getting
disappointed, deceived or let down in the future – where I am projecting myself
into the future and accessing memories of my past wherein I experienced such
scenarios with the beings that supposed to be responsible for taking care of me
– and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that
I may or might, within a relationship with another being, create assumptions in
relation to expecting that the other being will be there for me, assist or help
me in situations or moments where I have formed the presumption that the other
being would respond through standing by my side when I am faced with something
that I perceive as difficult or hard to walk through and face on my own – and so within this fear accepting and
allowing myself to push people away through utilizing anger, spitefulness and
exclusion immediately when or if I perceive another to in some way show any
form of pattern that implies that the other person thinks or believes that I
expect something, am in need of or dependent on that being – and I forgive
myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and assume
that if another person forms the idea and belief of me as being dependent on,
in need of or reliant on that person in any kind of way, then such idea and
belief would further result in the other being feeling obligated to assist and
support me – as though it is a duty rather than the other being actually
wanting to stand by my side and/or face and walk through something together
with me - and through this I see, realize and understand that I have formed
this pattern in where I react in anger, aversion, spitefulness and push people
away as a response within situations/moments wherein I interpret it as though
the other person’s starting-point and underlying reason for
assisting/supporting/standing by my side is based and founded on an experience
of obligation – where I see how the interpretation I form within the mind of
another person, feeling obligated to stand by my side will activate a program
and pattern within me where the intention is to show another that I absolutely
do not need no one and that I definitely do not expect another to be there for
me.
- I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to project and superimpose anger onto
another if or when I perceive the person to show any form of pattern that I
perceive as an indication of that being thinking or believing that I expect
assistance or support in any kind of way – wherein I forgive myself that I have
accepted and allowed myself to respond to such interpreted pattern through
excluding and ostracizing the other – and I forgive myself that I have not
accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that this anger that
comes up within me in situations where I perceive another to think or believe
that I expect something from or am dependent on that being, is actually
self-anger – because within this I see, realize and understand that these
instances/circumstances are triggering self-anger within me – where I become
angry with myself as a result of seeing that I have allowed myself to form expectations,
a dependency and attachment to another person – that I have allowed myself to ‘become
vulnerable’ from the perspective of accepting and allowing myself to get
influenced by who and how another person decides to be and so whether or not another
person decides to stand by my side when I am faced with and have to walk
through something difficult – and I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to be and become angry at and blame myself when I see myself
getting disappointed as a response to another person’s behavior and/or decision
of who to be in relation to that which I am faced with and have to walk through
– in where I see and realize that when I notice that I get influenced in any
kind of way due to another person’s decision of who to be as a response to who
I am or what I am faced with, I will immediately go into self-anger – due to
thinking and believing that letting myself get influenced by another person’s
behavior is an indication of me, accepting and allowing myself to not be independent
and strong enough but rather having allowed myself to become weak and stupid for expecting or wanting a
specific response from another person – where these situations become moments
where I am in a way telling myself ‘I told you so’ in spitefulness, where I
blame myself for not living according to the principle of ‘trust no one’.
- I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and form a general idea about
people wherein I think and believe that others are not to be trusted, that
others will always betray, lie and leave, that allowing myself to assume or expect
something or anything from another will always with no exceptions lead to
disappointment, that I am not to count on or expect others to support or help
me when I require assistance, that I am not to think that others would want to
help me if I would to ask for assistance, that others will always leave or in
some way deceive, that allowing myself to in any way get attached to another is
the most dangerous thing I can expose myself to – and within this not seeing or
realizing how this indicates a total lack of self-trust, as I am within this
expecting and assuming that I cannot trust myself to be able to stand stable
within situations where I perceive others to betray, live, leave, let down,
deceive etc. – thus thinking and believing that I require to prevent myself
from ever exposing myself to such conditions – instead of seeing and realizing
that what I rather would require as a point of prevention is for me to
incorporate and really live self-trust and self-support – where I rather learn
and practically live within self-stability in my self-relationship, trusting
myself and so my capacity to face situations and have relationships with other
beings without having to fear others possible behaviors but rather stand within
myself, trusting myself and so realize that all I need is me, is my self-trust,
is my commitment to not disappoint myself or let myself down from the
perspective of not living self-care and thus supporting myself no matter
external circumstances/situations – wherein I see and realize that what I would
require is for me to really understand that what I for certainty can trust is
myself and my capacity to direct myself within a situation to support myself,
to make sure that I stand by my side, wherein I realize that another or others
behaviors or what another decides to do are not to be taken personally, as I
see and realize that a decision made by another is never in fact caused by me
and so not my responsibility.
- When and as I think
and believe that I see a pattern within another that indicates that the person thinks
or believes that I expect something or anything from that being or am in some
way dependent, in need of or reliant on that person and in where I see myself
reacting in fear and anger where I feel the urge to push the other away – I stop
and I breathe – in this I commit myself to slow myself down and take a moment
to ground myself here – wherein I stop my participation within anger and
realize that excluding, projecting anger and spitefulness outwards onto another
will not and cannot solve my internal experiences – because within this I see,
realize and understand that when anger emerges within me it is merely
indicating self-anger, and so therefor I no more accept and allow myself to
take such anger out on another but instead I commit myself to support myself
through standing as my self-awareness, where I re-instruct myself within the
moment and direct myself out of the pattern through first making sure that I
slow myself down through breathing and in that ground myself here, within
myself, where I take the decision to stand by my side, to support myself and to
realize that I do have me – and therefor I commit myself to always make sure
that I am here for me, that I stand here with me and in that practice on
accepting and embracing the support and assistance that others give, where I
realize that others supporting me is their decision – and as I realize that I
remain here by my side, with me, supporting myself, I further see that there is
no need in fearing and resisting others support or fearing that I may not be
able to trust the support – because no matter what, I make sure that I stand by
my side.
