Showing posts with label Desire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Desire. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

An Implicit Competition - Day 385

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that what I say/share when communicating/interacting with another person will get attacked/criticized/cut down by the other in where another person use what I say ‘against me’ by implying that what I say/share is inadequate or wrong and that the other being knows more or is better/smarter - and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear saying/sharing something that may/might make the other being experience it as though I am flawed/inferior/less than that being – due to thinking and believing that what another person thinks of me can determine who I am – not seeing or realizing that even if what I say/share does or would get attacked/criticized/cut down by another, it does not necessarily and automatically mean that it is personal or that I require to take it personally but that I do actually have the capacity, the ability and the responsibility to decide who I am in every moment, and that even if or when I perceive it as though another judge me as inferior I am still responsible for how I internally respond to such interpretation – where I see, realize and understand that I am the one making myself inferior through accepting and allowing myself to be and become the judgments I perceive others to form of me or towards something I say, and so therefor I realize that there is actually nothing to fear here, that I require to stand my ground and decide who I am in every moment and thus realize that another person’s response to what I share/speak is a reflection of who they are – and that it is thus no need to take it personally or make it personal.

  • Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that the person I am interacting with will start an implicit ‘competition’ about who is the best/most educated/most knowledgeable where what I say/share gets ridiculed or repressed – due to thinking and believing that another human being can make me feel inferior, not seeing or realizing that it is only I who can make myself feel inferior through allowing myself to take someone else’s behaviors/words personally and within that making myself a victim through ‘just taking it’ instead of slowing myself down, looking inside of myself and so decide in every moment what I will accept and allow and what not – because within this I see, realize and understand that the reason for why another person’s behaviors/words trigger an experience of inferiority/inadequacy within me is because such program exist within me – where what is shown is that I still have points to work on and correct in regards to who I am within my relationship to me and in relation to self-acceptance, where I realize that within moments/situations where I perceive it as though another person attacks/ridicules what I share/speak are actually awesome opportunities where I can cross-reference where and who I am – where I can utilize such situations to practice on re-instructing myself to observe instead of inverting what comes up within my external reality.

  • And so I commit myself to assist and support myself when interacting with other beings, through being aware of who I am within such situations – to in that be able to slow myself down within moments where I see myself going into fear of being attacked/criticized or being seen as inferior/not as good as the other being – and so when I see that fear emerging within me I take a moment to slow myself down with breath and within that I commit myself to stand within and as self-acceptance – where I direct and decide who I am within me, no more accepting and allowing another person to tell me who I am or whether I am inferior or not.

  • I furthermore commit myself to assist and support myself within situations and moments where I see that I am interpreting/perceiving it as though another person is starting a competition about who is 'the best' etc. – where I within that immediately direct myself to not participate within such game, but instead I observe what is going on outside of me and within that let it be just that, outside of me – where I commit myself to no more accept and allow myself to invert whatever another person are implying but instead I let it play out and within that stand my ground through not accepting and allowing myself to take it personally or inverting it – but instead take such moments as opportunities to see where I am at, cross-referencing if any point within me isn’t clear and so also be able to get to know another being – as I see and realize that it is quite fascinating observing another person’s behavior and it is no need to take it personally or make it personal.


Sunday, May 5, 2013

Why Do We Resent Successful People? - Day 384

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the experience of being ‘less than’ or inferior to another person – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form a pattern of going into an internal competition with others where I feel the need to assert myself and prove to others that ‘I am just as good as you are’ whenever I perceive or interpret it as though another person is sharing or talking about their achievements/performances/accomplishments or are in some way acknowledging their own ‘success’ – where I within that have accepted and allowed myself to go into an experience of being inferior/less than/not as good as – and will consequentially attempt and try to obtain the other side of the polarity, where the desire to feel ‘good enough’ and ‘just as good as’ comes up within me, where I am essentially trying to balance out the internal fear and negative experience of ‘not being as good as another’ through going into an internal competition where I feel the need to assert myself to be able to obtain the positive experience of being ‘just as good as’.

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form an automatic pattern of wanting to, and believe that I require to, assert myself and prove that I am ‘just as good as another’ immediately whenever another person talks about their achievements/performances/accomplishments – and within that thinking and believing that another person will ‘think less of me’ or see me as inferior if I do not respond in the sense of letting them know that whatever they can or have accomplished is something that I have accomplished or am capable of as well – and so within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will ‘think less of me’ if or when I do not prove to myself and to others that I am ‘just as good as them’ .

  • I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to immediately and automatically go into the mind and compare myself to other people/another person whenever a being share/talk about an achievement/accomplishment – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt and try to validate a belief/idea/perception of myself in relation to being ‘just as good as the other person’ through going into and participating within an internal competition where I give value to and participate within the fear of ‘losing’ in the context of internally experiencing and perceiving myself to be inadequate and inferior and so within that feed and empower the desire to be able to validate a perception of myself as being ‘just as good as’ or better than/superior to the other being – where I within this forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become spiteful within me whenever I perceive it as though another person is bragging in the sense of attempting to appear as ‘better than’ or superior in some way – where I have allowed that perception of others to be and become a trigger-point within me where I will automatically respond through going into the tall poppy syndrome as a result of my internal fear of being seen as less than/not as good as/inadequate – and so within that go into resent because of another person’s achievement and my perception thereof merely because of my own internal fear of not being able to validate a belief/idea/perception of myself in relation to being ‘just as good as others’ and due to the desire to be able to obtain the internal experience of being better/superior.

  • Within this I commit myself to assist and support myself within situations/moments where I perceive it as though another person share/talk about their achievements/performances/accomplishments or are in some way acknowledging their ‘success’ and in where I within me see that fear of being/being seen as less than/inferior to emerge within me and so the want/need/desire to assert myself and prove to others that I am ‘just as good as you’, I within that take a moment to slow myself down, where I breathe and ground myself here – and so within that see, realize and understand that I do not require to prove anything – and so instead I take my place within myself where I move myself out of the fear and so the desire and instead direct myself where I decide to accept myself, and so realize that I do not require to externally assert myself or make myself seem ‘just as good as another’ because within me I stand as and within that point of self-acceptance for myself unconditionally. And so within this I commit myself to practice this point of simply remaining here, where I slow myself down and simply listen to and focus on what the being is sharing, where I direct myself to listen instead of attempting and trying to come up with some form of response within the mind which will ‘prove me just as good as’ but instead I give myself self-acceptance and so move myself out of the competition and instead place my focus and attention on what is really here as the interaction I am participating in.


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